A little over a year ago I was inspired to start this blog. I had been contemplating it for some time. I had been journaling on Caringbridge, mostly about Lauren's journey through treatment. I needed something that I could call my own, while still keeping everyone up to date on Lauren. What was my inspiration you say? It was attending the Stupid Cancer OMG! Summit for Young Adults.
I signed Lauren and I up for this conference for different reasons, yet they were so similar. We were both in desperate need of "fitting in" in a world where we were lost. My friends came to my rescue in the beginning and wrapped their loving protective arms around me, but after the initial shock wore off and things became routine, they had their own lives to get back to while mine stayed on cruise control in Cancerville. The best way to describe how I was feeling is to listen to the song Pardon Me, by Incubus.
So Pardon me while I burst into flames.
I've had enough of the world, and its people's mindless games
So Pardon me while I burn, and rise above the flame
Pardon me, pardon me. I'll never be the same.
I needed a support group or something similar and I found that at OMG2012! I found a renewed spirit that I didn't want to end. Ever. I wanted to place all of these new friends in my purse and take them home with me so that I would have my posse with me at all times. Luckily there's this thing called social media, and while I would love to have all these friends as close as possible, they too have their own lives and keeping in touch via Facebook and Twitter was what I had to settle with for now.
A year has gone by. Over the last year we have been embraced by the Stupid Cancer community in ways I could have never imagined. We were guests on the Stupid Cancer Radio Show and a pic posted of Lauren to cheer her on during treatment is THE most viral photo to date with over 450k likes and over three million people reached. WOW.
But the most powerful to date, for me, is being asked to be on the panel of other caregivers (parents) at the OMG2013 Summit. I felt so honored that they had enough confidence in me and my experiences as a caregiver to Lauren to ask this of me and I honestly couldn't wait to share. I knew that last year's summit was GREAT, but this year, 2013, was going to be AWESOME!
Everyone kept asking me if I was nervous about being a panelist. When you talk about cancer as much as I do, it becomes second nature. I am telling you right now, sans a degree/medical school, I am an honorary Momcologist (mom/nurse/oncologist). If you were to ask me all of Lauren's past and present medication list, I can name it off AND spell every single one (yes, I do have a cheat sheet on my iPhone but that's so I can print it out instead of writing down every single one - she currently takes about 80 pills per day including herbal supplements).
I also feel like I am an expert on telling people what NOT to do! I think all of my fellow panelists reiterated over and over that you HAVE to take time out for yourself. How do we know? Because we didn't and we all suffered for it. Asking for help has never been easy for me and still, to this day, I have trouble reaching out when I need the help. Setting up the fundraiser to help with travel for our Alabama trips wasn't even my idea but a really good friend's and I am so glad I took her advice. But I would have never done that on my own.
Aside from congregating with other Mom & Dad caregivers at OMG2013, I also attended a session on Healthcare Legislation and Reform as well as Expressive Writing For Wellness And Personal Growth, both very important topics to me. In the healthcare session, I learned what options we will have in the future in regards to insurance (something I've always worried about for both Lauren and myself; both having pre-existing conditions). The expressive writing session helped me (and Lauren - the only session we attended together) with the struggling I encounter on how much I want to share. I think it is important to share as much as possible in the hopes that what I am going through will help other Momcologists on their own journeys. And that is all I want to do ... contribute & share.
I met some pretty awesome survivors and caregivers at OMG2013. People of all walks of life, sharing in the same misfortune. Sharing. I love that word and if I didn't take anything away from the summit (and I did!), it is sharing Lauren and her journey with others. Sharing her has been extremely difficult for me since her diagnosis. Just ask her. Two summer camps cancelled at the last minute because I couldn't bear to be away from her (I'm talking about full on anxiety attacks at the thought of her being away from me for more than a few hours). Last year, she went to all the sessions with me. This year, we only went to one together. What I do know is that, if I am going to share her with anyone, it would be the 450+ new friends we made at OMG2013. I trust them. They love her too. Something we would have never found without Stupid Cancer.
Thank you Stupid Cancer.
Be sure to check out the pics from last year and this year ->> link on the right =)
PS. Lauren's CT scan is scheduled for tomorrow! Will update as soon as I get the report =)
